I believe anyone who was lucky enough to interact with someone coming from Italy must have experienced the purest feeling of hatred when the-food-which-cannot-be-named is brought up in the conversation. I’m obviously talking about the worldwide famous Hawaiian pizza, or la pizza con l’ananas as a few brave fellow citizens dare to pronounce.
I personally give credence to those rumours alluding to ‘pizzism‘ to be the second most professed cult in Italy, following Catholicism. On this matter, a wise man once revealed to his disciples that Italian people possess an exclusive gene which makes them extremely sensitive when it comes to pizza: it is indeed infants’ first word, a prolonged pizza withdrawal – read it as ‘more than 7 days‘ – provokes a short-circuiting of their metabolism; schools indoctrinate and sensitise students of any age to the pizza ideology.
Based on what foods and what ingredients can be permitted in the choice of the toppings, this complex credo claimed PINEAPPLE to be the arch-enemy of the party, that one and only food which mustn’t be featured in any allowed pizza version.
Whoever eats and enjoys Hawaiian pizza is irremediably accused to be an enemy of the Italian state. That’s a fact I had to make clear in order to save you from a reasonable physical collision in case you dare to order pineapple slices on your pizza during your stay in Italy. And if you are wondering, NO, you are not allowed to express your absurd love towards this abomination on my blog, being myself part of the religious movement. I admit, I once tested my faith and subjected myself to the tasting of Domino’s version of the Hawaiian pizza, and it didn’t go well, at all. I in fact needed to eat 10 Margherita pizzas of penitence in the following weeks in order to redeem from my sin.
All of this to say that, even though Italians can be incredibly fussy when pizza toppings are involved, the chance to pick a ‘pizza patatine e würstel‘ – or commonly also called Viennese – in an Italian pizzeria is not rare at all.
By discussing about it with people from other countries, I could observe that the most were baffled at the idea of eating pizza with fries and würstels on it. To be quite frank, this variant doesn’t get along with my current adult taste; hower it objectively is a very popular option in Italy, among children and young people above all. I for once used to be a fan of this pizza flavour, and I wasn’t able to enjoy pizza if it didn’t have an abundant layer of fries, which I swiftly ate one by one before the other people at the table had the chance to ask me to kindly give up on one of them. Later on, once the fries were all gone the pizza I was effectively going to eat was a simple Margherita with a few würstels slices scattered here and there, but the gratification derived by the chance of having pizza and fries all at once, without begging and imploring my parents to order the ‘always-denied’ extra dish of french fries, was unrivalled.
Ultimately, when you plan to pop in a pizzeria during your travel around Italy, try out this unusual combination and grant yourself a super high in calories Italian experience. Just keep in mind to never, ever ask for a Hawaiian pizza if your intention is to enjoy the rest of your holiday outside the safe walls of your country’s embassy: Italian people are fervent followers of pizzism and they may never forgive your bad taste.
Are you interested in reading more about the shocking aspects of Italian culture? I wrote a post about the bidet, which you might be interested in if you fancy topics related to hygiene and racial ideology!